The recent Supreme Court decision to allow the Boy Scouts of America to reject gays challenges efforts to promote an inclusive society. It is important to learn as much as possible in order to behave responsibly should we be in the position one day to make a difference. The following list is one part of that effort.

1. Use the term sexual orientation, rather than sexual preference. Sexual orientation focuses on the sexual and affectional relationships of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and heterosexual persons. Preference suggests a degree of voluntary choice.

2. Lesbian and gay are preferred to the word homosexual. The word homosexual perpetuates negative stereotypes concerning pathology and criminal behavior.

3. Same-gender sexual behavior, male-male sexual behavior, and female-female sexual behavior are appropriate terms for referring to same-gender sexual behavior. Male-female sexual behavior is preferred to opposite sex behavior in order to avoid polarization.

4. Bisexual men and women, bisexual partners, or bisexual as an adjective refer to people who relate sexually and affectionally to women and men. Omission of the term in discussion of sexual orientation gives the incorrect impression that all people relate exclusively to one gender.

5. Heterosexual as an adjective is acceptable for people who have male-female affectional and sexual relationships and who do not engage in sexual relationships with people of the same gender.

6. The term sex is often confused with sexual behavior, and this is particularly troublesome when differentiating between sexual orientation and gender. Avoid use of the words that can cause one word to be misinterpreted for the other. Using the term gender is generally more precise.

7. Use examples of lesbians, gay men, and bisexual persons in your diversity work.

8. Avoid referring to sexual and intimate relationships as though it occurs only between men and women.

9. Avoid uses of inaccurate stereotypes about lesbian, gay, and bisexual person.

10. Know your own biases. If you harbor anti same gender affection and sexual relations, it can hinder your effectiveness as a diversity trainer. It is important that you acknowledge these biases and consider how they can hinder your work. Ask yourself if there are ways to avoid harming others with your biases. Some choose only to do diversity work in their religious group or some other organization that shares similar values and beliefs. However, be clear that excluding certain groups as a diversity trainer is a contradiction. Perhaps you will serve others better in another capacity.

Based on an article by the Committee on Lesbian and Gay Concerns, American Psychologist (Sept 1991).